In These Trying Times

Gospel          
25 October 2009      
30^th Sunday in Ordinary Time       
Mk. 10:46-52

by Grace Y. Ponce

I believe I’ve been a diligent Catholic, fulfilling my Christian duties even as a child. Then, an unexpected burden came to me, my faith has been put into test, I was stormed –to a point of giving up.

The same month, after my eldest daughter Sarah recovered from acute pneumonia, my then one-month old daughter Shane experienced difficulty breathing. Her pediatrician advised me to have my baby admitted the very day of her checkup.

Upon admission, the attending doctors from the ER had her checked again. Mom was with her at that time because I needed to pay the deposit before we could move in to the room. As soon as I came back, I saw mom teary eyed. Then I saw that the doctor was trying to put a funnel into my baby’s mouth… I panicked; the nurses said baby was not breathing well. I started to cry, my mind is off my head. The nurse tried to comfort me by saying, “Mommy, don’t worry your baby is already in the hospital,” assuring me that everything will be alright.

My baby continuedl not breathing well. The doctor then ordered to have her intubated her right away. An air tube was put inside the baby’s mouth attached to an oxygen tank to be able to support her breathing, 84% of which dependent on the air tank. If Shane can’t withstand the tube, next move … respirator – a device which will mechanically support the baby’s breathing.

I became in doubt at that very moment, my heart is tearing apart seeing my helpless baby… where was I that all of this things happened? Am I not been looking-up for my baby all along? So many questions lingering on my mind….I’m a terrible mom… my heart is breaking.

Lord, be my courage in times of fear, be my refuge and my strength in these trying times! 

Answered Prayer. I know that my Lord is carrying me through this burden. Deep in my heart I believe that He will never fail me and He didn’t. My baby’s condition became better, miraculously things changed. On our ninth day Sarah was able to sustain 90% breathing on her own. My baby is a fighter, she knew very well that mom, dad and her sister Sarah misses her and is excitedly waiting for her.

Now Shane is healthy and strong… learning her firsts steps, uttering her first word. I called to God and He answered me… “Go your way; your faith has saved you.”  I know it did save not only me but my baby Shane’s life. And continue to praise God for His miraculous gift that I will forever put to heart.